Note: as of 2025 05 20 this website won't be updated anymore. Consider inactive unless stated otherwise.
Chatrooms suck
I used to be very active in the GrapheneOS and Secureblue chatrooms, but I deleted my Matrix and Discord accounts. And I think you should do the same for any chat rooms you are active in.
Before I start my criticism, I would first like to point out there are benefits to chat rooms. Being able to discuss something with people who have the same interests as you can be very helpful and you might be able to see persepectives you might not otherwise.
That said, I think the reality of chat rooms is unfortunately far from the utopian vision.
Debates
Debates can be helpful to see a different perspective, but only in case you are ready to do so. Most people usually will just try to convince others of their own opinion.
Sensetionalism
People tend to share things they find exeptional or interesting. (I am assuming good faith here). If something doesn't make the headlines, people will be less likely to share that piece of information, even if it's still interesting or useful. This depends a lot on the community of course.
In general I think large communities online tend to become anti-social. You try to grab the attention of people instead of just conversing with others.
Lack of structured discussion
Like I mentioned above, everything tends to devolve into debates instead of useful discussion.
There is usually no clear topic, most discussion takes place in offtopic channels. In other words, people talk about things they don't really understand or don't even want to understand.
over/under Moderation
Moderation is hard. And even if it's done very well, like in my opinion in the Secureblue Discord and GrapheneOS chat rooms, it still kinda sucks...
Free speech absolutists will say that any moderation is bad. That is obviously false. But balancing between over and undermoderation is hard. If there is not enough moderation, trolling and chaos ensues and if there is too much moderation, it leads to people self-censoring and not saying anything that goes against the common census.
Echo chambers
Another big issue are echo chambers. People will talk with others just to re-affirm their own beliefs they already hold.
The solution
So what's the solution then?
I think the solution to these problems is private chatrooms or one-on-one conversations with people you know. This fixes the moderation and sensetionalism issues, since you're more liekly to share more trivial information with people you know well.
Conclusion
Touch grass and talk to people instead of being terminally online.